once upon a time i was someone who had a dream... and i made the dreams of others come alive.
i "saw" something that was in the ether - the "other" - and i brought it to life in this world.
and then i lost that vison - for a while. but now, i am finding it yet again.
this is a personal journey - shared by many who are walking along parallel paths.
tonite i am listening to songs of those whose hearts follow that same yearning. kaye bohler, for one - her song "how do i get there" just came up as i was typing. that is a question for all of us on this journey.
how DO i get there - and how do any of us achieve the dreams that drive us onward, upward - all in the face of unseeming odds.
i am feeling re-born. why now? why at this time?
this is a crossroads for us all - we all have decisions to make - roads to choose - political, personal, private roads - but the question remains the same: how do i get there when my world is closing in? those are the lyrics of a dreamer - kaye wrote those words a few years ago and she still struggles on that path. i asked that same question decades ago and i am STILL asking that question.
HOW do i get there - and where is "there" - what is that dream that eludes my grasp and why do i keep reaching?
this isn't just my journey - it is ALL of our journeys - how DO we get there?
what drives us - what motivates us and why don't we just give in to the inertia of staying in one place that is where we are now...
these are questions for a late nite pondering of the soul. these are the questions from the sadness of the loss of someone loved by a friend. these are the questions of life and the living when faced with the dying and death of those dreams and those who are loved.
just a midnight's pondering as we regroup and refocus on what matters in our lives - in my life.
as i see my precious sani and my dreams for us together creating beautiful music together turning into a dissonent symphony, i am faced with changing music - changing dreams - yet, still faced with the beauty of that which is instead of that which could be... what more could we ask of life.
that is the question.
that is for you all to ponder - and to find individual answers...
just thoughts in the middle of the night after the storm has passed before the next winds blow...